Ahhhh! Those awful preconceived notions of the “perfect” woman, or should I say the Playboy image of the perfect woman. Big breasted, small waisted, long-legged, and unfortunately not candidates for Jeopardy, fits the mold of what has been tantalizingly tempting men since the 1950’s. Women have fought back hard and gained respect being different from the so called norm.
So how have women changed? The good news is that there are no so called “norms” any longer. I’m going to concentrate only on 5 different types or groups of women. All very different; one group has to do with smarts, another is attitude, these gals are never boring, a third is slightly older but often much wiser, the fourth is the one who has learned what men like and how to manage (control?) them by using her feminine wiles and finally, the group that surprisingly seems to be the best “closers” and get the pick of the litter. Now that I’ve piqued your curiosity, let’s meet these ladies.
1) The Brainy Babe. I think smart is sexy, in fact, very sexy. The three things I looked for in a woman during my decade of dating, were tied for first place at the top of my list; Smart, Funny and Nice. Nice happens to be my favorite four letter word. I learned it from my son when he was 15. He was “going steady” with a neighbor’s daughter, and my ex-wife and I both thought it would be better for the “kids” to be just friends, not dating. Being exclusive, at that age, seemed to be rushing the romance way too quickly. So I spoke with him and asked what he liked most about her. He said it was a four letter word. My mind did flip-flops wondering what four letter word he was going to shock me with, but of course I’ve already told you, he said she was the “nicest person” he has ever known. “In fact, we can talk about everything and I think she would kill to protect me. But if you’re concerned, we have set limits on our intimacy, and have had this same conversation with her parents, so don’t worry.” I fell in love with the word NICE. It is especially appropriate today, with so many inconsiderate people all around us. I’m stimulated by smart people. I know many men who are intimidated by intelligent women. I don’t know whether they have a fragile ego or an insecurity problem, but for me, intelligence is what’s necessary to be able to really fall in love. Of course, funny is funny. It’s just a strong need of mine to have a partner with a great sense of humor. Laughing together is fabulous.
2) The Spontaneous, Creative, Free Spirit. With her it’s never boring. She loves different. She takes you along, marching to a different drummer, hers. You’ll see sunrises and sunsets, you didn’t even know such beauty in nature existed. You will go to and see more beauty in Museums that you never envisioned. The same for movies, music, friends, and very often, her use of incredible lateral thinking. Many times you’ll remember saying “I never even thought of that, or looked at it that way.” Her spontaneity will never cease to amaze you. Her unique take on faith will possibly be the most interesting thoughts on this complicated subject you ever heard. Many men who have the guts to fall for a free spirit, are often rewarded with an explosion of personal creativity they never believed was possible, especially after having lived their formal, routine, uptight, boring lives. She often helps him discover the new more romantic, creative side he never knew he possessed.
3) The Older yet Wiser Woman. Richer doesn’t necessarily mean wiser. It seems that old boys with their toys are not only challenging the balance of nature, they are often embarrassing themselves attempting to keep up with girls who could be their granddaughters. Hello, Hef. Men reach their sexual peaks from 18 to 24, women from 28 to 34, so in order to properly satisfy their raging loins, younger men should be with women about 10 years older. Can anybody tell me who created this great eternal plan and why? When you explore the entire situation, it makes sense and is good for all age groups. There are still the majority of couples, both young and old who are together, that are close in age, but let’s continue exploring the others. Young girls, too immature and inexperienced to be great moms yet, should allow older men to teach them worldly ways before being in the family way. She should travel to wonderful, far away places she would normally miss as a young mom. The old guy has his fantasy world and she is taking, traveling and learning. That leaves younger men and older women who have been left behind. This situation also works out well for them. She will have the young strong, hard, lover she needs to satisfy her raging sexual needs and he is learning to be a gentleman and a great lover, while they also travel the world using the money the old guy left her, so he could be with the teenager.
4) The Sexy Lady who Knows How to Use IT. The turning point for me was my last year in college. I lived in the Fraternity house and women were not permitted to go upstairs. Even grandmas, aunts, or much older, or much younger sisters had to use the down stairs restroom and not permitted to go visit the upstairs bedrooms. The following year, in 1960 when I graduated, rules were miraculously changed so women were allowed to not only go upstairs, but they were sharing bedrooms and bathrooms. Historically women would never call a man for a date; they rarely ever tried to pick-up a man, and hardly ever told dirty jokes. Nowadays there is gender equality. Men and women talk about sex and have no problem picking up a one-night stand with zero remorse, (unless the sex is bad). Sure, there are still some old-fashioned, young women waiting at home to be asked out on a date. But because the others are out fooling around, it makes it easy for guys not to pay to go out on a date, or even commit to a relationship, when the sex is readily available. However, I think the tide may be turning. I’ve spoken to a few women in their 20’s and they appreciate their equality and freedom, but the “Friends with benefits” arrangements are not lasting beyond a couple of months, and they are secretly looking for their soul mate and to get into a serious relationship.
5) Plain Jane’s with all the “Hot Guys.” Did you ever go to a party and see a group of cool, ”hot” guys hanging around and laughing with a plain Jane type? She’s learned to love sports, action games and movies, so it’s easy to be one of the boys. She speaks their language. What happens when a man in a restaurant accidentally wanders into a ladies room? You can hear the shrieking all the way out to the car Valet. But if a women happens to wander into a men’s room, “Hi honey, come on in, nice to see you, can I get you something?” What is wrong with this picture? At least men have something to see and hopefully hide. But the gal I was referring to before, is the one who would give the same greeting to the guy who came into the ladies room. She is cool and comfortable with the guys. Just one of the boys. But she knows something they don’t. She knows how to read them. She has figured out the “secret” how to reach men. She knows the three kinds of men and how to listen to them, understand them, and approach them in their most comfortable language. This secret technique is explained in detail in my book. The e-book version was released for sale yesterday. If you would like to read it, it’s now available on my new Website www.stophatingdating and please let me know your thoughts.
Guys, now I need some input from you. Please write and tell me what type of woman you prefer. Ladies, which of the above categories do you think you fall into and how is it going? I would love to create a dialogue using your comments, but I need you to submit them and any questions you many have.
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