In my book “101 Way to Stop Hating Dating,” I reveal how a guy can tell whether a woman is into him or not. Many men are afraid of rejection and they look into a mirror so they think “Why would a women that spectacular be even slightly interested in an average guy like me?” Guys, you’d be very surprised how many women are into confidence (the Alpha Male), funny (the Seinfeld or Louis CK male) or the super smart (Bill Gates or Warren Buffet). Very rich even without the smart and funny also works, but I’ve often heard that women who just go for money, look for smart and funny on the side.
So guys, if you know you are smart and funny, you need to boost your confidence and be able to approach ANY woman. It’s really easy, you just have to be yourself. Once you’re engaged in stimulating conversation or making her laugh, you could be on your way to romance. Just think of the concept; no lines, no come-on’s, no showing off, all you have to do is think of her as a normal, needy person and BE YOURSELF.
For the first half of my life, I was very needy. I craved to be loved, or at least liked by everybody, (even if I didn’t like them). I was like a puppy licking everybody’s face just to be accepted. Until that fateful day when I befriended a reclusive Billionaire. He was so shy he avoided a cocktail hour at a social event because the idea of having to schmooze with others made him physically ill. I spotted him kind of hiding out on the balcony of a social hall, so I walked up the stairs to talk with him. He surprisingly remembered me from only a previous brief meeting. I asked him if it was O.K. to share the balcony railing looking down over the socializers below. After we had chatted awhile, he said something that I never would forget. After I asked him how many guys told him they would love to switch lives with him, he said “Marty, I would love to switch personalities with you. I panic in social situations and you look like you’re always getting the last line in and having the most fun”. BOOM!!! Rockets went off as my tiny little ego became energized. No, not annoying, but confident. Ever since then I stopped caring whether people liked me or not. I just charged ahead and spoke to everybody no matter who they were or what they looked like.
Mel Brooks had always been one of my comedy hero’s. When I told a friend in the business about meeting Mel someday, he said Mel is in California now shooting his new film “Silent Movie.” It’s full of stars and since there’s no sound in the movie, anybody who is anybody and in between gigs comes to the set to be entertained by Mel. I can get you on the set. Interested? Another BOOM. I flew to California, nervously tried to sleep the night before and was in the receptionist office, as instructed, by 9 a.m. Monday morning waiting to be taken to the movie set. The receptionist apologized profusely while telling me the Studio told Mel, on Friday afternoon, that he was over budget and behind schedule because he was wasting too much time entertaining his friends. So they ordered the set to be closed and nobody thought of calling me to not make the trip. On the looong plane ride back to New York, I vowed to keep trying to finally meet Mel. A few months later, I told the sad but still funny story to my friend Steve who said “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” Mel and Annie have a house next to us on fire Island and our kids go sailing every Sunday. So come out to the beach next Saturday, we’ll have a bar-b-que, stay over till Sunday and spend quality time with Mel, he’ll love you.”
I was so nervous about my upcoming trip to Fire Island to met Mel that I couldn’t concentrate during my Saturday morning Tennis match. On my last overhead, I took a misstep and heard something POP on the bottom of my foot. The emergency room doctor gave me a shot, a pair of crutches and said, “A torn metatarsal bone will self heal in about a month. Use the crutches and take painkillers.”
Later in the afternoon, I painfully drove the one hour to take the ferry to Fire Island and FINALLY meet my comedy hero. Did you ever use crutches on sand? It was about a half mile walk from the ferry landing to my friend Steve’s house. He said “Go next door to introduce yourself and you’ll see them later at dinner.” When he said next door, it was about the length of three football fields to go to the Brooks’ Bungalow. I was in pain, hair matted down, sweating like crazy when I finally spotted a beautiful body in a tiny white bikini coved up by a huge white hat. I stood at the fence clearing my throat, until Anne Bancroft looked up and said “Sorry, I don’t have any change.” She lowered her hat and resumed reading. “Wait” I yelled, “I’m Marty the friend of the Kess’s , we are having dinner tonight and sailing with the kids tomorrow.” Then I went into at least a 20 minute story about how I love Mel and being so disappointed not seeing him in California, and trying so hard to met him and reviewing his career and my broken metatarsal bone in my foot and on and on. She sat there on her chaise staring at me without saying a word. She finally spoke. “Mel’s not here, he had to rush to London this morning and I’m not sure when he’ll be back. “Do you know who I am?” “Of course, I know you. I saw “The Miracle Worker” so many times, you are my favorite actress, and you’re so bright and funny, I love you.” She said “Too Late. If you first came over and said Oh My God, it’s Anne Bancroft, my favorite actress and how sexy you look in that bikini.” “I would have jumped up, given you a big hug and many kisses, taken you inside for a great Italian lunch and then f*ck your brains out. But since you’d rather talk about Mel, hit the road.”
The story has a happy ending. Jet-lagged Mel got back the following afternoon, we had a nice Sunday Bar-b-que, watched the kids sail, and I made him and Annie laugh several times.
So keep trying, be persistent, quitters never win and winners never quit, and the rewards may be unexpectedly spectacular.
Please tell me your thoughts in the Comment section. Do you have any super persistence stories?
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